As Matt Laur’s newest acuser is being attacked for speaking up, mostly by women, I felt compelled to write about it. I don’t think the treatment is fair. This larger issue that we are all discussing is more about the devaluation of women. It’s not just in the workplace, it’s throughout the entire world. Girls are still being genitally mutilated in some countries. In some villages a man can sell his daughter in exchange for a cow. The question is of a women’s worth and value. The #metoo movement stems from women who are tired of being mistreated and devalued. Are our hands totally clean in this complicated issue? Probably not. But it still does not undermine the systemic de-humanization of women. That’s why they’re coming forward. That’s why she came forward. To support her sisters in a world where the woman is usually blamed or not believed. She came forward as a corroborative witness to his character so that we could decide for ourselves if the evidence is credible. The more people who come forward suggests there is some truth to the matter. She admitted her relationship was consensual and that she made a mistake. She was all of 24 and he was 40 so some assumptions can be made there, but I think her point was this…he enticed, coerced (not forced) her into a sexual relationship and once he got what he wanted he dismissed her. It’s a game lots of men play. As if women are sexual objects. As if we have no value or meaning other than to be used for sex. As if we have no feelings. No voice. I’m sure she was shocked and angry she consented after the fact…haven’t we all been, only to have him refuse her calls when she’s being stalked by the National Enquirer at 24 yrs old. She had hoped he would offer her some career advice or assistance with the press. He got what he wanted and then discarded her, treating her as if she was an object. As if her feelings didn’t matter. As if she had no ‘say so’ in the matter. I’m in no way defending what she did, I’m speaking to the larger issue of female degradation. This is about ending mistreatment. Let’s not turn on ourselves and attack the woman while we dismiss his behavior as that’s just what men do. He cheated on his wife multiple times and engaged in behavior that was a violation of his company’s policy and put his wife and family at risk. We shouldn’t judge at all but if we are going to judge, let’s judge both parties equally. Let’s remember to also extend grace equally.
To your journey,