Big Sigh. I’m in my mid forties. Glad I’m here, but never thought I would be. Really just didn’t think about it. Try not to think about it much, but then there are days like today.
I’m in Target trying on a cute little racer back maxi dress. Loving how it looks. Until…
What’s that under my arm? That…right there in the mirror. That thing. (I raise my arm and move closer to the mirror). It looks like….it looks like chicken skin! Kinda’ loose and a little shrivel-ly. But alas, it’s my armpit. I take a deep breath knowing that wasn’t like that last summer. I’ll have to start moisturizing under there. Probably should have been doing it before now. Hope it’s not too late.
But then a smile creeps across my face. I remind myself that it’s all good. I love being in this space. I am a woman. A grown woman. One who knows what she wants. One who’s clear about her values. No longer striving for things but realizing I have all that I need. I love that this age has brought with it the ability to relax a bit more and be okay with things. The question of Who am I has finally been replaced with the definitive statement of This is who I am.
I don’t have the body I would like to have but I can now, for the first time, accept myself completely. I’ll change what I want to change when and if I decide to and always for the right reasons. I now understand that peace and joy are in my control. I get to decide. I get to choose. Do I have all the answers? No. But I’m content to let the journey unfold, allowing each of life’s precious pitfalls to teach me more about myself.
So…chicken skin, goat skin, spider veins. Bring them on. I welcome you. You’re a reminder of the long road I’ve traveled to get here and all that I’ve become.
To Your Journey,
Tonya Lampley is a fiction author and Certified Life Coach. She is passionate about living life to the fullest and uses skills learned from her work as a coach as well as lessons from her own journey to write articles providing tips for successful living and to tell stories of hope and personal triumph. Her debut novel was titled A Taste of Love and was a National Indie Excellence Awards finalist. Her short story titled Birthday Surprise received honorable mention in the Writer’s Digest Short Story Contest. For more information about Tonya and her works please visit www.TonyaLampley.com.
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